Time, Why you Punish me?

You read correctly. That is a reference to a Hootie and the Blowish song. Once again, I had a conversation about dating and relationships last night with my best friend. This got me thinking about timing and how it, much like Nature, can be very fickle and sometimes unforgiving. My PIC (partner in crime) happens to be dating my other best friend, who is probably the one with the best guypinions. While I talked about being twitterpated over One Good Man, the question came up about how her boyfriend felt about my dating situation.

He suggests that I wait to get into anything. Kinda late for that isn't it?

Timing works on a very skewed scale for me, much like my standards for dating. My standards are most girls' standards for dating. To serve as a reminder, I actually have standards and plan to use them this time. That being said, I am by comparison taking my time with dating this time around. Me and OGM have been seeing each other for about a month. Previously, I had been officially unattached for a month. But really, looking back at my past relationship, I was pretty much single for six months. Thus proving I work on a very different scale than most girls. I'm obviously not most girls.

By now, five years ago, I would be spending every single day with him, spending the night with him, doing fun things when spending the night with him (cough), and telling everyone who will listen about my boyfriend I just started seeing a week ago. Me and OGM have been seeing each other once or twice a week, we don't talk everyday, and it hasn't gone to the sexual point of no return. And he treats me well. So far. Yes, I am still bracing myself for the catch. I think some would say I'm cautiously optimistic.

One of my other guy friends had this scale for time that he suggested I use: For every year you are together, that should be the amount of months to wait before dating again. So if you were with someone for two years, you should wait two months before moving on. Not sure how you feel about that, but really it just sounds complicated. You and I both know dating is complicated enough!

In short, timing is all relative. And I've learned that when it comes to dating, timing is never good. We have to reshape how we deal with situations. I've had friends who have married and later found their true missing puzzle piece soon after. It happens. And then they deal with it. Because what can you do right? Very rarely is the timing right for these kind of things. Some people wait 25 years to begin a life with someone they could love. If you're Katy Perry, you date the hilarious guy who looks like an oversized rat and marry him right away.

When it comes to dating and timing, you absolutely have to listen to your gut. I value the opinions of my friends, but this is one of those situations where you have to remind them that they may not know what to do if they were in your shoes. Sometimes it's very difficult to sit back and put aside your opinions about your friends' relationships. But remember whose life it is. While you may not always support their decisions, it's best to put those feelings aside, especially if they are genuinely happy.

You can have your own master plan about dating and what you want to do and when, and formulate the steps to get there. I'm just here to remind you that whatever powers that be will laugh at you and throw you a curveball.

You ready to catch?

For giggles, here is Thumper and Bambi learning what it is to be "twitterpated."